What's Your Focus?

It's been awhile..a long while!

I don't know about any of you, but I get so caught up in the stresses of life. To a point where God no longer is my focus, but it's that thing that has taken it's spot center stage. In your life there will always be something that is your focus. That something can be anything. So many times we are blind to idolatry in our lives because we don't take the time to reevaluate what really takes precedence in our hearts.
A lot of times the hardships I'm facing take that center stage role. The thing is I don't think I'm dwelling on it when I pray and pray and pray about it...but I am. Don't get me wrong we are supposed to cast all our cares on the Lord. But that's just it we are supposed to cast our cares upon him. Give them to him and  let go. So many times we miss the let go part. Why am I not feeling your peace Lord?  Maybe it's because you aren't trusting God entirely to take care of you. And that's when something gets put before God.

An idol is anybody or anything that has our love and loyalty ahead of God, and as a result decreases our dependence on Him, our desperation for Him and our devotion to Him.

I don't love being stressed out, but when I think about it I am pretty loyal to it. I give my hardships lots of attention. Or sometimes it's other things that I put before God unintentionally. Things that you would think how could that be idolatry? Serving in the church can take precedence over God. Family, friends, music...whatever!

I'm writing this to you to urge you to look at yourself...really look at your heart and ask yourself is there anything I am putting before God? And then do something about it! After all even if you look and see that God is right where he is intended to be in your life, there is always room to grow! 1 Corinthians 10:12 says Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall.

It feels good to be able to see God working. When your eyes are focused on something other than Him it is so easy to doubt. When you refocus...When you ask God to rekindle that flame in your heart, He is faithful and He will do it. And then it's so clear that he is right here and that he has been here all along! 

I'm praying for you all as this new year approaches. Praying for His guidance in your life and that you would taste and see that the Lord is good!

It is not okay for me to be singing and proclaiming truth in Jesus' name and not bringing those words to life.

I think about this topic a lot.

About the fact that I am inadequate to be the one to lead people in worship.

I haven't totally become okay with it. I don't feel like I'm the one for the job.

Sometimes I feel like Moses when he said to the Lord "Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?”.

Who am I that I should be the worship leader.

Later Moses says,“Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.”Then the Lord said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord?Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.”

But God I'm a background type person. I don't do well speaking.---

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

It is my honor to be leading people in worship to the one true God! The moment I take my eyes off of him though is when I start sinking. He told me in my weakness he would be strong so I have absolutely nothing to worry about. My job is to obey.

Matt Redman recently posted, Unstoppable worshippers are bold evangelists, lifting up the name of Jesus everywhere they get a chance. Their offerings of worship are just as vibrant outside the walls of the church as they are inside. —from the book, The Unquenchable Worshipper

I can honestly say with sadness that I'm not living out my faith boldly. I keep to myself when I should be reaching out. We are the body of Christ. Jesus gives us a clear picture of the life we should be living. Lord help me not to hold back, but fully and completely live for you! I don't want worship to become mundane. I want it to be true.  

Learning to be the light

It's so much easier for me to keep to myself at school. SO MUCH EASIER!!! I know what the Lord is trying to teach me though...GEEZ!!!

I'm learning to be the light.

My passion is to tell people about Jesus and lead people to him.

I'm trying to accept the fact that evangelism starts right here.

I'm learning to be the light right where I am today. I pray that you are too :)

It's so much brighter living in your world

Savior, what you did for me

You gave me something I want everyone to see

When we struggle and it all goes wrong, only you can make it right

So I say oh oh oh oh oh

I'm learning to be the light

You are faithful.

The truth is it freaks me out that I'm going to start college in a few days.

While praying the other day The Lord put a piece of scripture in my heart. Lamentations 3:

But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.” The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord...Let us test and examine our ways, and return to the Lord ! Let us lift up our hearts and hands to God in heaven:... “I called on your name, O Lord, from the depths of the pit; you heard my plea, ‘Do not close your ear to my cry for help!’ You came near when I called on you; you said, ‘Do not fear!’ 

Lamentations 3:21-26, 40, 41, 55-57

God is faithful. I can hold on to the promise that he is with me, and he loves me unconditionally! At the end of the day all that really matters is that I glorified God. 

I was positive I was not going to pass the test to get into running start, and I said

Lord, if this is what you want, you know what to do...so sure enough I passed the test my first try.  

I've been starting to realize that He just wants me to trust him. So I'm gonna trust you Lord. I'm gonna need you to keep me focused because I just know I'm going to be distracted so easily by schoolwork. I want to be bold in my faith. I want to make a difference in the lives of the people around me. I'm taking your hand Lord. I trust you.

God is with us...

You can probably tell that I'm not the kind of person to erase or start over. I just kind of pour out whatever is going on in my life all over this computer screen and hope and pray someone can relate and be encouraged. Today I debated on whether or not I should erase the beginning and just go straight into the good stuff, but I think that would defeat the whole point of wanting to be transparent...sooo here you will find all that has been on my mind over the last couple days of not writing anything...

 I hate stressing out about having to juggle school (which hasn't even started), worship, quality time with the Lord, and family...I don't even have it that hard.

Life can feel so hard though.

I get so caught up in planning and prioritizing that my focus just gets off of God.

Why is it so hard to just trust that God's got it handled? Why does it feel like I can't let go?

I know I've said all this before. This is one of my biggest challenges. 

Oh Lord, I need a breakthrough! One minute I can feel the freedom of totally depending on you, and the next minute I'm looking down and I realize, wow I'm up high, and I start depending on myself. I need you to breakthrough my doubt. I need you to show me once again how to let go. 

So you may be wondering, where is the happy Ally? Which I apologize for any complaining I've done...

She's here. 

Just in writing this I'm able to feel the presence of the Lord. (Which makes me beyond happy)

God is good, isn't he?

Joshua 1:9 says,

"...Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

He is with me wherever I go...

He is with you wherever you go.

Now that's got to bring a smile to your face.

Thank you God!

I want to encourage anyone who is feeling defeated, worn out, or frightened...whatever it is, remember God is with you wherever you go. Be strong. Be courageous. Remember you're not in this alone. 

I thought I would share with you that tomorrow I will be getting baptized. I've struggled with being baptized over the last few years because I didn't want to do it for the wrong reasons. Baptism is not something to be taken lightly. At this moment I finally feel ready to do it. It's not a matter of pleasing people around me anymore. I'm doing this to show the Lord my dedication to Him. I want to be obedient to His call. I want to be faithful. I want to trust HIM with all of my heart, and love him with all of my heart, mind, soul, and strength. I want to be changed from the inside out. I want him to use me. Although he already knows that, this is my public declaration of me giving my life over to the one true God! 

Lord, keep my eyes focused on you. You are all I need. Prepare my heart for tomorrow as I take another step out on the water. I'm letting go again. I'm refocusing. Through you I can do this.

I’m letting go again

Don’t want the day to end...like this

No matter how many times a day

I’ll keep giving it away...to you

‘Cause I want you Lord. I need you Jesus.

I can’t let go alone.

So Jesus, come and set me free    

Pour your grace out on me

         

Why does it feel

Like I have to be in control

Am I afraid of knowing, of changing, of growing

Why am I holding back?

Why am I standing still?

Lord you take the lead, oh once again would you take control

‘Cause I want you Lord. I need you Jesus.

I can’t let go alone.

So Jesus, come and set me free    

Pour your grace out on me

come and set me free

I am free

~Letting Go~

Here comes the rain again...

There's a flood watch in effect for Western Washington today!!

I have started writing this and then deleted it a few times now.  I suppose because I am not feeling so profound in thought - but feel like there is something I want to express about the strong feelings that seem to accompany a change of seasons.  Fall is truly my favorite time of year - and yet - conversely - it is tinged with a certain melancholy.  Somehow, the season seems to make me focus more inward and I am not always comfortable with what I find there.

In the summer days of my life - oh I am really getting profound and metaphoric now - I need to focus all the more on knowing my Savior and serving him.  It is easy in those days to instead just be immersed in the sunshine and pleasure of life outside of my walk with the Lord.  Instead I should be cultivating and growing spiritually to prepare for a harvest that will leave my storehouses full when the rain and storms set in. My joy cannot be ultimately founded in summer sunshine, the crisp mornings and colors of Fall or any other external factors.  These seasons and times come and go.  A heart that is focused on the Lord will know joy and stability throughout any season of the year or of life.

Lord, I look to you for all of my needs as I know you alone are sufficient.  I pray you will fill my heart with your joy and sustain me through this day.  I want to be able to give myself away to others instead of getting caught up in my own head and focusing on me.  Thank you for the sun.  Thank you for the rain. Help me to not be constantly up and down and blown by the wind - but set my feet solidly on the rock and give me the strength to stand.
-mike






...metaphoric??

You are good.

Sorry for missing a few days. My cousin started a blog on a different site and I fell in love with it soooooo I talked my family into doing a "family blog" based on our journey as we follow in His steps! I'm still going to post on here but if you want to check the other one out the web address is asformeandmyhouse8.wordpress.com

We're still working on getting it going FYI

The past two weeks I have been attending another youth group on Tuesday nights. It's been great being able to have two nights of fellowship and bible study! 

God never seizes to amaze me! I guess that shouldn't surprise me. His word says, 

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

I'm not going to try and stretch this out. All I want to do is encourage you, that whatever struggle you're going through God promises he will work everything together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose! What an awesome promise! What an awesome hope we can have in Him!

Thank you Lord for your love and mercy and faithfulness! Thank you for everything you've shown me even just in this week. I'm so in love with you, and I pray that love would grow deeper and stronger every minute of everyday! I pray for the people reading this that are struggling. I pray that you would remind them of that verse in Romans. I pray for those of us that seem to have blessings constantly being given to us. Remind us that it's all because of you! We give you thanks and praise! Thank you for accepting my short and sweet prayers and posts. You are good God! 

In Jesus' name AMEN

God is faithful

God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. 1 Corinthians 1:9

Only God is completely faithful.  Everything else will either fail or fade away.  But God remains. It is so important that we do not take this for granted but instead respond daily to it through seeking him and spending time with Him. This faithful God called ME into fellowship with Jesus Christ. There is no greater honor.

Lord, I call on you today to draw me close to you and to help me know fellowship with Jesus. In 15 minutes the cares of the world will begin to bombard me.  Please show me how to remain in you every moment of the day and not to set you aside or compartmentalize you in my day.  Thank you Lord for loving me without condition.   - Amen

I need you.

*sigh*

Well today has been interesting. 

Ended up playing guitar for the all worship Service we had! Helped pack up Alana's stuff. Brought her to her moms. Tried not to cry. Then I started thinking about school. Oh man! I sure need Gods help to change my attitude. 

I'm so thankful for my family and friends, and the never ending love and support I get from them.

As I lay here and just breath, I'm able to remember I sure do need The Lord.

I'm learning to not always ask God to take heartache away or whatever hardships are coming my way...instead I've been able to realize that He uses those times to make me stronger. To show me through him I can overcome. 

My heart is heavy right now. There seems to always be things that are just bleh going on. Especially when I'm digging into the Word, and spending more and more time with The Lord. There is definitely a spiritual war going on. Thank you Lord that I can call on your name and be saved. 

I need you more Lord. Thank you for always being there. You know all the things on my heart tonight...would you please strengthen my heart. Teach me to be more like you I pray. Lord I pray for anyone and everyone reading this blog. For everything going on in their lives right now. Comfort them Lord. Bring healing to any brokenness inside of them. May they remember you love them, and they CAN overcome any obstacles in their  life through you! Thank you for the many blessings you've poured out on us. You give and you take away. We will bless your name no matter what. We love you Lord and pray all this in Jesus' name amen.

Embrace the process

Blessed are those who keep his testimonies, who seek him with their whole heart, Psalm 119:2

Think about it...

We are supposed to love The Lord our God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. To seek him with our whole heart.

It's much easier said than done.

I mess up so much. If it wasn't for Gods forgiveness, and grace, I don't know where I'd be. I would feel horrible all the time. And I should feel horrible about sin. But because of what Jesus did on the cross there IS forgiveness and second chances! 

Don't linger in your wrongdoings! LET IT GO! GET RIGHT WITH GOD! 

We will never love The Lord with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength if we're stuck in our past. We've got to give it to God and seek him with all we've got. 

A lot of times Gods will for our life isn't obvious to us. (No wonder with all the distractions.) Knowing Gods will is soooo important. We need to LOOK, and SEARCH. It's our desire...our passion that leads to the "Big Reveal"

In the meantime, as we search, we need to serve people, tell them about the love of Christ, and trust God. Even while we're waiting we need to be running this race with perseverance!

And once we know his will we need to DO it. 

Faithfulness pays off. (Being loyal, constant, and steadfast)

Embrace the struggle, and the process, of finding your personal call. God told us he would be with us. So I'm trusting him. I'm reaching out. I'm super excited to see where he leads!!!

Passion for your name.

Let me start off by apologizing for any errors in my writing...I'm too tired to catch everything :) okay carry on...

Doesn't it feel amazing to be loved by God? I know most of us "know" he loves us, but I mean when we can feel it. When our heart feels full because of his love.

This love gives me a passion for God! 

But overtime that same love that stirred my heart so much so that it was overflowing, can become a thing of the past...and that passion can fade.

The bible reminds us in 2 Timothy to fan into flame the gift of God. 

A lot of times I describe my passion as a fire in my heart, and you can picture that fire growing dimmer until you're left with the glowing embers. That's when we need to "fan into flame" and that fire will burn bright once again.

So then the question is how?

I believe it's by prayer. It's by trusting God. It's by fellowship. It's by remembering God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7 

The song consuming fire, comes to my mind as I write this...it's pretty short so here it is,

There must be more than this,

O breath of God come breathe within,

There must be more than this,

Spirit of God we wait for You.

Fill us anew we pray,

Fill us anew we pray.

Consuming fire fan into flame,

A passion for Your Name,

Spirit of God fall in this place,

Lord have Your way,

Lord have Your way with us,

Come like a rushing wind,

Clothe us with power from on high,

Now set the captives free,

Leave us abandoned to Your praise.

Lord let Your glory fall,

Lord let Your glory fall.

Stir it up in our hearts Lord,

Stir it up in our hearts Lord,

Stir it up in our hearts Lord,

A passion for Your Name.

I don't want to let this passion go. If you've  ever had that fire in your heart you know it makes you desire for more. And we can't have that same passion apart from God. 

Many times I've made the mistake of thinking,

well if I prayed more or read the bible more I would have that passion again

But that's a lie.

We've got to surrender and say Lord I don't feel you. That fire in my heart has died. Stir it up in my heart once again! And He will! 

I think a big part of rekindling the flame is being transparent with your brothers and sisters in Christ. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one struggling but I'm not...and there is power in prayer and power in numbers, so share your thoughts and prayers with the brothers and sisters God has put in your life. Being transparent puts accountability in your life, support, correction...it does a lot! So I would encourage you to share your prayers with others. 

Trust me I do not like telling people about my struggles and sometimes I don't even like talking about the awesome stuff happening...I'm just weird! I know shocker cause that's exactly what I do on my blog. I  have no clue who all reads this...I'm not sure if I would even want to know :)

Anyways if you need a prayer partner feel free to leave a comment. I'll be praying for you whether you do or don't :) 

Thank you Lord for putting this passion in my heart! Thank you for encouraging me through your word and music, my family, and friends! I feel so blessed! I pray for each and every person who reads this blog Lord...even if I've only reached 1's of 3's ;) Lord fan into flame the fire that you've put in their hearts! Take our hand and guide us in your steps. May our eyes be focused on you now and forever. 

In your precious name! Amen!

Don't stop.

Man! It sure seems like the closer I grow to God, the more troubles come my way.

I guess we are guaranteed that though. The devils always at work. But so is God! I find that whenever bad things happen, hard times come, or everything is ridiculously busy, I'm on my knees a lot in  prayer. 

I heard a song the other day...it's pretty much exactly what I needed! The chorus goes,

Don't stop the madness 

Don't stop the chaos

Don't stop the pain surrounding me

Don't be afraid, Lord, to break my heart

Just bring me down to my knees

Nothing slips through Gods fingers. Hard times come, but his word says in Romans 8:37

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

No matter what comes at us, through Jesus, we have the power to overcome! We are MORE than conquerors! 

Yeah, don't get me wrong, it would be amazing if everything always went right...but then there would be no need for a savior. Honestly, if The Lord made everything go absolutely wonderful in my life I'm not sure that I would be on my knees every day asking for his grace. I wouldn't need him. 

So I say, 

Don't stop the madness

Don't stop the chaos

Don't stop the pain inside of me

Do whatever it takes, Lord, to give me your heart

And bring me down to my knees

Every struggle thrown at me allows me to grow. As well as the non-chaotic times :)

I'm thankful for everything God has allowed me to go through, and everything he has pulled me through. And all the amazing things he has planned for my life, and yours, as we follow in His steps. 

God is good. What? All the time.______ 

Oh! And Lord...DON'T STOP WITH YOUR LOVE. :)

And what makes all this even better is that we aren't in this struggle alone!

Love.

It was David's one year anniversary with us today. Which is exciting and heart breaking to know he could be gone soon. 

There's a whole bunch I could complain about. I specialize in complaining. But I'll stop there :)

I was sharing some songs with Dani that were inspiring me. One is called All of me. I told her the story behind the song, then I started singing it. She said it reminded her of David. The chorus goes,

You're gonna have all of me

You're gonna have all of me

Cause you're worth every fallen tear

You're worth facing any fears

You're gonna know all my love

Even if its not enough

Enough to mend our broken hearts

But giving you all of me is where I'll start

It was an eye opener. I've said so many times "I think I love David too much" but mom was right when she said you can't love someone too much. Yes my heart may break when he leaves. But while he is here I'm gonna give him all of me. He is worth the tears I cry and everything else this family has gone through for him. I love him more than words can express. And even though it hurts I want to be obedient to Gods call.

I guess I say these things to you to remind you...DON'T BE AFRAID TO LOVE

Mark 12:30-31 says,

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” 

We've got to be people of love. The world will know us by our love. I don't know about you, but I yearn for my Heavenly Father! I want to be more like him! The bible says he is love. 

Thank you Lord for loving me so unconditionally! Show me how to love like you have loved me! Show me how to love the unlovable. Lord I want to be a person of love. I want to know you! You're my hearts desire! Lord take control and guide me in your steps. 

Amen

Focus!

Focus! Focus!
 When my mom reads this I know what she'll be thinking...It was my technique when I helped potty train David. :)

But this time I'm saying it for myself.

I get stressed out and worried so easily! I love that God has surrounded me with people that remind me He has a plan for my life! An awesome one! I honestly don't need to worry at all.

Like I've said before, I like to plan ahead, but I need to learn to live day by day. I need to learn to wake up EVERY morning and say "God USE me today." I want to find peace in that, not more stress.

When I plan things I tend to hesitate on them. Sometimes it's as simple as just planning on seeing how someones doing. So many times I just end up forgetting or thinking, No, I'm sure their fine.

It's when I decide to "live for today" that I get to see AMAZING things! There are days that I just know I need to reach out and see how so and so is doing, and when I just do it I find out it was a much needed thing. It makes people feel cherished. It shows them that I don't just talk-the-talk but I walk-the-walk.

There are a few people that will randomly write me on facebook or call and see how I'm doing, or let me know they appreciate me. It makes me feel good! It makes me feel loved.

So I'm not going to say, "I'll work on it."

I'm just going to do it. I'm just going to take the time right now to say Lord the day is almost done but use me.  And tomorrow morning I'll do the same. With God's help I won't hesitate. And He promises peace...

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
James 14:27

Lord here I am having to get refocused...again. Lord you know my worries and stresses, take them away. I've got so much to learn...Give me peace that passes all understanding! Thank you for reaching out to me! For reminding me your there. For being patient with me. 

"And all you ask of me is to give you my everything I give you my everything"

Trust without borders

Tomorrow morning I leave to spend a week in Warden, Wa on a mission trip.

Last year I decided to go on the day they were leaving...my sister had dropped out last minute and I felt The Lord telling me to go.  This year I originally was going out of guilt. Out of wanting to please others. 

I'm at a point in my walk with God where I know I've grown but I know there's so much more growing that needs to be done. 

I feel The Lord saying, You want to grow? Here's your answer

This is a growing experience.

This is an...I'm tired and stressed and I don't want to step out my comfort zone but because I want to grow I'll go. experience :)

I want to grow. 

I want to follow in His steps.

It's what I committed to do...and what this blog is supposed to be about.

So now I'm doing this not to please others, but to honor God and bring him glory. I'm leading worship there to honor him and bring him glory. 

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders 

Let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith would be made stronger in the  presence of my savior 

When I first heard this song I was beyond blessed by it. The words described exactly what I was feeling and where I was, with God. So I pray those words over my life, and over this next week. 

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders 

Let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith would be made stronger in the  presence of my savior 

I want to trust you without borders God! Take me there, as I follow in your steps, and into the streets of Warden proclaiming the good news! Bless every single person going on this trip. May their eyes be opened! In Jesus' name... Would you agree with me? Amen!

Never Unnoticed

I love being right with God. And I love talking to him. I was laying here thinking about someone who just never seems to notice me.  Then I realized that it doesn't matter if there are people who don't even seem to know I exist...I only need Gods recognition! And I never go unnoticed by God!

I wish I didn't even focus a tiny bit on what the world thinks of me. God never ceases to make me feel loved! I never have to wait a minute for Him. He's available 24/7, and He always will be! I never go unnoticed to Him!!! I love that I don't have to say that over and over again trying to convince myself. It's truth. No matter where I'm at or what time it is I feel Gods presence with me! And it's absolutely wonderful! 

I long to be able to hear that still small voice more and more. I never want to ignore it. 

This coming week I want to make people feel noticed. I want to show them the love that God shows me. I want to show them that that love is free to them too!

Thank you Lord for your love!

Blessed!

Today I am struck with the fact that God has blessed me with amazing family and friends! I am so thankful for the encouragement I get from the people in my life, as well as the loving corrections!

We celebrated Adams (my daycare brothers) 2nd birthday! I can't believe he's already two! 

As I looked out on the lake today I realized we didn't even have my three brothers last year when he turned one! That's so weird to me! I feel like we've had them for forever. It'll be David's one year anniversary in August and Javons 1st birthday in September! So many things have happened over the year! They've changed me so much. I can't imagine my life without them! 

Pretty soon we'll have a new family member! Adams mom is having a baby! Life never seems to slow down and keeps getting more complicated and exciting. I'm glad I have the best family and friends that are able to experience all of this with me! And the majority of them are wanting to follow in His steps like me! 

I have amazing role models in my life! I'm thankful for every single one of them! 

Thank you Lord for placing these people in my life!

Grrr

I desperately need Gods help with my attitude. I wish people didn't lie... Actually I just want sin to vanish!

I am so thankful that God has given my family the opportunity to foster! I'm serious it's the best thing that's ever happened to me! I love the boys with all my heart! Which makes everything more excruciatingly painful! 

Lord I do believe, help my overcome my unbelief! I trust you and know you have a plan for me my family and these wonderful three boys! Show me how to LOVE THE UNLOVABLE, show me how to REACH THE UNREACHABLE, help me now TO DO THE IMPOSSIBLE! Help me to forgive!!!  Give me peace! I want your love to pour out of me! Please, give me a joy unspeakable, a peace that passes all understanding!!

Use me God! 

In your precious name Amen!

Here I am

I believe today would be day 74 of the WWJD challenge...

That's a long time! I'm already able to look back and see how much I've grown! I can't wait to look back a year from now!

As I get to know God more it's clear to me that it's not an option to go and tell people about God! We are supposed to go and make disciples! Man! It's crazy how it can be so much easier to go to another country and do that, than it is to go to your neighbor. At least that's how it is for me.

I depend on myself way to much! I've said that so many times in this blog. That's my biggest stumbling block. I've seen what totally surrendering and letting God lead can do! That's what I want every day of my life! And that's how it should be!

He tells me to be strong and courageous...to be bold! He says he will use our weaknesses to show his strength! He will put words in my mouth. All I have to say is here I am use me Lord! With God I've already won! I have nothing to worry about! He is reaching out his hand, and all I need to do is take it! It's so simple.

I don't want to let fear control me. Fear of being judged by the people around me for being bold in my faith. A verse a day on Facebook is not "reaching out" enough! So I'll take His hand, I will let Him lead! He has amazing things planned for my life and your life!

"You’re reaching out to me oh I can see you've got something beautiful planned

  So I’ll take hold of you I know you’ll pull me through

No matter what happens, I will follow you"

: :Reaching Out To Me

HERE I AM USE ME LORD!

Into the heart of the darkest places
Into the lost and the lonely spaces
Bringing the hope and the life You've given
I'll move cause You move me

Into the lives of forgotten children
Showing the love they were never given
Open my eyes to the world I don't see
Show me cause I know...

We need, a heart for the hopeless, reaching
The places unspoken, move me Lord
Raise up, a desperate people, leading
The lost and feeble, use me Lord
Use me Lord

Give me a fire that's always burning
Every desire for You is stirring
I am alive now to show Your glory
I'll move cause You move me

Into the light when Your love is shining
Only by faith with Your Spirit guiding
Open my eyes to the world I don't see
Show me cause I know...

We need, a heart for the hopeless, reaching
The places unspoken, move me Lord
Raise up, a desperate people, leading
The broken and feeble, use me Lord
Here I am, use me Lord

We need to wake up
We need to raise up
Cause I will never stand still, Lord keep me moving, moving

We need, a heart for the hopeless, reaching
The places unspoken, move me Lord
Here I am, use me Lord
Raise up, a desperate people, leading
The broken and feeble, use me Lord
Here I am, use me Lord

We need, a heart for the hopeless, reaching
The places unspoken, use me Lord
Use me Lord
Raise up, a desperate people, leading
The broken and feeble, use me Lord
Here I am, use me Lord 

Shine Shine Shine Your Light!: Favorites♥ Playlist

Shine Shine Shine Your Light!: Favorites♥ Playlist

On My Knees

Life is hard! And it seems to keep getting harder! I hate how many times I have to do it but once again I NEED to give it all to Jesus!

So God, here I am again! On my knees...I give it all to you. I have no clue what I am doing. No clue at all!  Take control. Guide me! Make it totally clear where you want me. Please! Thank you Jesus for your peace, your patience, and your love!

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
    From where does my help come? 

 My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth.

Psalm 121:1

Troubles chasing me again
Breaking down my best defense
I’m looking
God, I’m looking for You
Weary just won’t let me rest
And fear is filling up my head
I’m longing
God, I’m longing for You
But I will


Find You in the place I’m in
Find You when I’m at my end
Find You when there’s nothing left of me to offer You except for brokenness
You lift me up, You never leave me thirsty
When I am weak, when I am lost and searching
I find You on my knees


So what if sorrow shakes my faith
What if heartache still remains
I’ll trust You
My God, I’ll trust You
‘Cause You are faithful
And I will


When my hope is gone
When the fear is strong
When the pain is real
When it’s hard to heal
When my faith is shaken
And my heart is broken
And my joy is stolen
God, I know that
You lift me up, You never leave me searching

 

Dry Bones

I based our bible study on Ezekiel 37 a couple nights ago, and talked about how the Lord can bring life into our "pile of dry bones".

And he said to me, “Son of man, can these bones live?” And I answered, “O Lord God, you know.” ⁴ Then he said to me, “Prophesy over these bones, and say to them, O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord. ⁵ Thus says the Lord God to these bones: Behold, I will cause breath^[b] to enter you, and you shall live.  

 The obvious answer to God would be no, they can't live. But God is about to show Ezekiel something amazing.

So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I prophesied, there was a sound, and behold, a rattling,^[c] and the bones came together, bone to its bone. ⁸ And I looked, and behold, there were sinews on them, and flesh had come upon them, and skin had covered them. But there was no breath in them. ⁹ Then he said to me, “Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to the breath, Thus says the Lord God: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe on these slain, that they may live.” ¹⁰ So I prophesied as he commanded me, and the breath came into them, and they lived and stood on their feet, an exceedingly great army.

God used this vision as a metaphor. He compared the whole house of Israel to the dry bones. The Israelites believed all hope was lost, but all hope wasn't lost. God was going to mend what was broken. The same healing, and same hope is what God offers us! He wants to breath life into our dry bones! He wants to make us new! What a great thing! no matter how far gone we are he longs to make us new and all we need to do is accept this wonderful gift of grace!

 It's important to remember and easy to forget that even if we are made new we are still faced with hard things but instead of feeling hopeless and defeated we are able to overcome through Christ Jesus! We just need to come to him.

Click this and listen to this AMAZING song!---->

Awake My Soul

Breathe on me, breath of God, breathe on me
Breathe on me, breath of God, breathe on me
I come alive, I’m alive when you breathe on me
I come alive, I’m alive when you breathe on me

Chorus:
Awake, awake, awake my soul,
God resurrect these bones
From death to life, for you alone
Awake my soul

Speak to me, word of God, speak to me
Speak to me, word of God, speak to me
I come alive, I’m alive when you speak to me
I come alive, I’m alive when you speak to me

Chorus:
Awake, awake, awake my soul,
God resurrect these bones
From death to life, for you alone
Awake my soul

Then He said to me,
“Prophesy to these bones and say to them,
Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!
This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones,
I will make breath into you,
And you will come to life.”
So I prophesied as I was commanded.
As I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound,
And the bones came together, bone to bone.
And I looked, and tendons and the flesh appeared on them,
And skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.
Then He said to me,
Prophesy to the breath,
Prophesy, son of man, and say to it,
Come from four winds, oh breath, and breathe.

Chorus:
Awake, awake, awake my soul,
God resurrect these bones
From death to life, for you alone
Awake my soul

Awake, awake, awake my soul,
God resurrect these bones
From death to life, for you alone
Awake my soul

Yeah, I’m not alone, I realize
I breathe out, I come alive
Your word gives life to my dry bones
Your breath tells death it can ride on
Awake me, make me a living stone,
A testament to your throne, I
I’m nothing without you, I’m on my own
The only one who satisfies my soul

Striving after the wind...

As we read in Ecclesiastes tonight I had to stop and ask myself, Am I striving after the wind? Over and over again Ecclesiastes tells us that trying to do things our way and trying to fill God’s place in our lives with something of our own choosing, is like striving after the wind.

I think a lot of times I start off with my focus on God and it seems to quickly change to what does he want me to do. Does that make sense? So rather than saying God lead me and use me I am saying where does God want to use me, and not actually looking to him for the answer. Hopefully that makes sense :)

Anyways I don't want to be taking Gods place in my life or putting something else there which I tend to do and then thankfully it's as if God is snapping saying Hello I'm over here, you're not going to get anywhere worthwhile until you put your focus back on me. And it's true! I am so thankful that he always directs my focus back to him, and usually quickly, but I don't want to lose focus in the first place!

I like to look at the future, and have a plan. My mind set is, once you get here it's going to be easier...but that isn't true. Ecclesiastes talks about living in the now, and finding joy in it. It also says "enjoy your youth" and to "walk in the ways of your heart and the sight of your eyes." It is always important to look around verses, the verse goes on to say, "But know that for all these things God will bring you into judgement." So in other words...Follow your heart...but your heart needs to be following God.

Gods intention is for us to enjoy life! So that's what I will do! I'll keep fixing my eyes back on him no matter how many times I have to do it, and stay humble. I don't deserve Gods mercy, and I never want to think that I am deserving or that I can do this on my own. Thank you God for your grace!

The book ends with this...

"Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil."

I want to follow God and I believe that as I follow him I will find joy in the now!

It’s so easy to forget

 that your mercy has redeemed us

 In the midst of all of this 

how could I believe 

that I am one bit deserving.

 ...

 I fix my eyes upon your cross 

I stand in amazement of your mercy that is 

new every morning

 that covers me 

and its all I need

 I'm so undeserving

...

Sometimes I get so caught up in this life 

and the lie that I can save myself

 and I get nowhere 

and I can’t see you

 but I want to

...

So I fix my eyes upon your cross 

I stand in amazement of your mercy that is

new every morning

 that covers me 

and its all I need

 I'm so undeserving

...

I don’t want to fall away

 I don’t wanna believe that I can measure up to you

 the only way that I am saved

 is through grace alone

 and I put my faith in you 

I put my faith in you

 I am so undeserving 

I’m so undeserving

 of your love

 and your mercy 

and your grace 

I’m so undeserving 

so undeserving 

...

 I fix my eyes upon your cross 

I stand in amazement of your mercy that is

new every morning

 that covers me 

and its all I need

 I'm so undeserving